Preface
If you’ve read other entries on this site, particularly the restaurant entries, you are familiar with my writing style of putting thoughts into dialogue, and/or exaggerating actual dialogue. This story, however, is not an example of that style. I felt this needed to be mentioned because it may appear to be unrealistic dialogue, but, I assure you, below is a fairly accurate, unexaggerated retelling of the words exchanged. And without further ado…
Cheer goes to a DJ/dance event at a bar in Brooklyn. Come 4am, no more alcohol can be served, the music stops, the lights go up, and the night is coming to a close. Cheer stands at the bar sipping water, waiting for a friend, when a man appears out of nowhere.
Man: “Well, hello there.”
Cheer: “Hi.”
Man: “What’s your name?”
Cheer: “Cheer.”
Man: “Wow. Really? Cheer? That’s really great.”
Cheer: “Thanks. What’s your name?”
Man: “Jake.”
Cheer: “Nice to meet you, Jake.”
Jake: “Cheer…wow. Aren’t you something.”
Cheer: “Haha. Thanks. Tell me something, Jake…”
Jake: “What?”
Cheer: “Where’d you come from? This event is just ending and I’m pretty certain you weren’t here earlier.”
Jake: “I came to meet my friend over there.”
Cheer: “Ah. I see.”
Jake looks Cheer up and down and bites his lower lip.
Jake: “Man…Wow…You’re really cute.”
Cheer: “Why thank you.”
Jake pointing to Cheer’s chest: “What’s this?”
Cheer: “Uhhh. That’s the string thing holding my shirt together.”
Jake: “That’s my string.”
Cheer: “Uh, no, pretty sure it’s mine.”
Jake: “OK. It’s our string.
Cheer gives Jake a ‘really?’ look.
Cheer: “Uhhh, no.”
Jake: “I’d like to pull that string.”
Cheer: “I bet you would.”
Jake: “What are you doing? Where you going now?”
Cheer: “Well, I’m going to get on a train, and it’s going to take me home.”
Jake: “I don’t think you should do that.”
Cheer: “Oh?”
Jake: “I think you should come back to my place. I live really close.”
Cheer: “Un-huh.”
Jake: “I have a big screen TV.”
Cheer: “Haha. Good for you.”
Jake: “And I can bench 225.”
Jake gives Cheer a quick eye brow raise and a now-you-want-me look.
Cheer: “I’m more impressed by the TV.”
Jake speaks slowly and quietly, while turning his chin down and his eyes up, as to appear sexy.
Jake: “Come on. I want you to come over and watch Star Wars on my big screen TV.”
Cheer: “Haha. Star Wars, huh?”
Jake moves closer to Cheer and speaks quietly into her ear.
Jake: “Yeah, and I want to make you breakfast. You like bacon and eggs?”
Cheer: “You want me to come to your place to watch Star Wars, and you want to make me breakfast.”
Jake: “Yeah. I could also make you a Mexican breakfast. Would you like that better?”
Cheer: “Haha.”
Cheer is pretty sure Jake thinks she is laughing with him, instead of at him.
Jake: “C’mon. I’m a tall Mexican. You know you want a tall Mexican.”
Cheer: “Haha. Oh, really?”
Jake: “Yeah, I’m 6’3”. You love it. You just want a big, tall, dark-haired Mexican.”
Jake stands closer to Cheer and attempts to wrap his hand around her waist. She slyly swivels away from him.
Cheer: “I’m pretty sure you’re not 6’3”, and you may be ethnically Mexican, but I’m pretty sure you were born in the US.”
Jake leans into Cheer.
Jake: “Well, OK, yes, but I’m still a tall Mexican…who wants to lick you all over.”
Cheer: “Haha. Wow. Tempting.”
Cheer takes a step back.
Jake looks at Cheer all dreamy-eyed.
Jake: “Wow. You’re…wow. Hey, don’t you go anywhere. I’ll be right back. I’m going to the bathroom.”
Cheer: “Right.”
Moments later the staff asks everyone to exit the bar, and Cheer gets her things and goes outside.
In front of the bar, Cheer and her friends discuss subways versus taxis and who’s going where. It’s raining, so everyone is neatly lined up against the building under a small overhang.
Jake comes outside with his friend.
Jake: “Hey. This is my roommate and friend, Dylan.”
Cheer: “Hi, Dylan.”
Dylan: “So, are you coming with us?”
Cheer: “Heh. Wow. Uhh, no. Sorry.”
Jake: “Oh, c’mon.”
Jake leans into Cheer again.
Jake: “Come over and watch Star Wars with this tall Mexican who wants you…badly.”
Cheer: “You know, you drive a hard bargain. But, as tempting as Star Wars on a big screen TV, breakfast, and a tall Mexican, who can supposedly bench 225, who I met 10 minutes ago, sounds, I’m not going home with you. Sorry.”
Jake sighs but does not leave.
A taxi has been called and the group waits.
Again Jake speaks slowly in his attempt at a sexy voice.
Jake: “How about muffins? We could have muffins for breakfast.”
Cheer: “Well I wasn’t convinced before, but now that muffins are involved…”
Jake: “Oh. Man…you’re just so…”
Cheer: “Not happening.”
The taxi arrives, and Cheer and four others head toward it. As she walks away, Cheer waves to Jake and says ‘Nice to meet you.’ Jake waves, and, like other outstanding members of society who have blatantly propositioned Cheer in the past, Jake does not ask for Cheer’s number. Cheer is not surprised.