Party Size: 2

Customer 1: Man, late 30s, most likely married to customer 2

Customer 2: Woman, late 30s, most likely regrets marrying customer 1

Cheer: “Would you care for a cocktail or maybe a glass of wine while you look at the menu?”

Man: “I’ll have a Coors Light.”

Cheer: “I’m sorry, we don’t have Coors Light. We have…”

Man: “What?!”

Cheer: “Most of our beer comes from microbreweries. The closest beer we have to Coors Light would be…”

Man: “I’m ignoring you now. Beer flavored water is my only fuel, which you cannot provide, which means you are completely useless. I’m now going to send a death glare at my wife for bringing me to the devil’s lair.”

Woman: “I-I-I’m sorry. I thought they’d have it.”

Cheer: “Sir, there are physical rays of hate shooting from your Coors Light soul into your wife. I’m getting hate shrapnel over here. Are you sure you don’t want to try…”

Man: “I don’t try new things. I’ve been drinking Coors Light since conception and I’ll die drinking Coors Light in my trailer. Bring water if you must, but I won’t touch it.”

Cheer: “Okay…I’ll just ask your wife if she has any independent thoughts and would like something beside water to drink.”

Woman: “No. Just water please. The last time I had an independent thought I brought my husband to a place that doesn’t provide the one true god of beers, Coors Light.”